I'm not sad. I'm damn happy about it.

What parenting has taught me about the lies we inherit in business

Yesterday, my daughter finished her final GCSE exam.

We marked the moment with the ceremonial binning of her uniform, well, bagging it up for charity, but you get the symbolism. Her revision notes landed in the recycling bin with a satisfying thud. Twelve years of primary & secondary education. Done. College here we come

By the evening, my feed was full of nostalgic parents posting side-by-side photos of first and last days, asking, “Where did the time go?” Friends messaged to check how I was coping.

But here’s the thing:

I'm not sad. Not even a little bit.

I'm proud, excited, bloody relieved she’s moving into her next adventure (and NO MORE flash cards! I feel joy watching her step into her independence with confidence.

Mourning her childhood? Wishing I could turn back time? Feeling like something precious has died?

Not at all.

And that made me pause: What’s wrong with me?

When you don’t feel what you’re supposed to

The answer, of course, is… nothing. Nothing is wrong with me.

We’ve been taught that good mums get weepy at every milestone, that growing up should tug at our heartstrings, and that when your child walks out of school for the last time, you should have a lump in your throat and a photo montage ready for Instagram.

There’s this unspoken emotional script we’re meant to follow, like there’s only one acceptable way to feel.

But what if your honest reaction doesn’t match that script?

What if you’re not crying but quietly cheering?

This doesn’t stop at parenting. We face the same pressure at work too.

You’re meant to hustle, always seeking growth (for growth’s sake) and being endlessly grateful for your seat at the table, even if the chair’s freakin’ uncomfortable and the conversation doesn’t reflect your values (yep, I’ve definitely been there!)

We suck up these “shoulds” and assume they must be true but maybe… they’re just someone else’s story.

What this has to do with business

This moment, this quiet rebellion against the narrative of maternal melancholy, got me thinking..

In business we also inherit stories about what success should look like, how women in business should behave, what we’re meant to want or not want.

And just like with parenting, we rarely stop to ask if any of it actually fits.

“You have to hustle harder than everyone else.”
“Work-life balance means having it all, all the time.”
“If you’re not scaling, you’re stalling.”
“You should be grateful just to have a seat at the table.”
“Don’t be too ambitious, it makes people uncomfortable.”
“Good entrepreneurs sacrifice everything for their business.”

Blah blah blah. These aren’t truths, they’re hand-me-down narratives and, god, are they heavy.

But what if they’re just that - stories? And what if they don’t serve you?

The courage to feel differently

Here’s what I’ve learned from not mourning my daughter’s childhood:

Your honest response is more valuable than your expected one.

When I feel proud instead of sad, I stay grounded in what’s real; my daughter is growing, thriving, becoming something amazing (even if she’s not quite sure what that is yet). So why on earth would I wish that away?

And the same applies in business. When you stop performing the strategies and emotions you think you should have, and start telling your truth about what you actually want, everything shifts.

Maybe you don’t want to scale to seven figures. Maybe you don’t want to pitch, or post daily. Maybe you hate networking events and do your best thinking when you’re walking the dog.

That doesn’t make you less ambitious, It makes you clear and, most importantly, it makes you,YOU.

A framework for rewriting your script

If you're ready to step outside a narrative that no longer fits, start here:

1. Audit your inherited stories

Ask yourself:

• Who told me this had to be true?

• Who benefits from me believing it?

• Does this belief reflect my actual values?

• What would I do differently if I let it go?

2. Get brutally honest about what you want

• What does success actually look like for you?

• What are you performing rather than living?

• What would you do if no one was watching?

• What boundaries need setting?

3. Create your counter-story

This isn’t about rebellion, it’s about alignment.

• Define your values and stick to them.

• Name what matters most to you.

• Seek proof that your way works (spoiler: it does).

• Expect pushback and stay rooted in your why (you don’t need validation from people that will never buy from you. Instead focus on sharing your story with those that will)

4. Share your story strategically

• Start small. Safe spaces first.

• Use your platform to make taking a different path, totally normal

• Lead by example, not by preaching or selling.

• Let your story act as a signal to the right people (and sod the others)

There’s power in that there truth

When you own what you want and speak your truth, you stop chasing approval and start creating something amazing. You stop bending yourself to fit someone else’s version of success and playing games you never wanted to win. And you start building something that actually feels like you. Good huh?

5 questions that might change everything

If you’re feeling the urge to re-write your story, try these:

1. What business story am I carrying that I never consciously chose?

2. What would I do differently if I didn’t care what people think?

3. What version of success would actually serve my life?

4. Who’s breaking the “rules” I think I have to follow and thriving?

5. What’s the worst that could happen if I told the truth?

(And the best-case scenario? That’s usually better than we dare to imagine.)

What she’s really learning

These shifts don’t usually start with a big bang. They start quietly, with one woman saying, “Hang on a minute, this story doesn’t work for me.”

One honest moment. A decision to stop going through the motions. A gentle nudge towards what’s real. And that’s what my daughter is watching. She’s seeing me move through this moment without pretending to be sad just because that’s what the script says.

She’s learning that it’s OK to feel joy when things change and that excitement rather than sad emotion doesn’t mean I have a heart of stone. She’s also learning that truth, her unique truth, matters more than performance and she doesn’t have to follow someone else’s script.

That’s the legacy I want to leave her. And it’s what I want for all women. Not perfection, not pretending, just truth.

Your turn

Here’s your reminder that you don’t have to carry every story you’ve inherited. You get to question what fits, bin some completely and re-write the ones that matter. Because your version of success doesn’t need to look like anyone else’s. It just needs to feel like yours.

Have a think today about…

What story are you ready to release?
What truth is waiting to be told?
And what might happen if you chose to lead with that?

I'd love to hear in the comments" or "Hit reply and tell me.

Hilary xx